Lotz of thoughts

At first, it was a hello and a flickering cursor…. What continued was checking for messages the whole day…. The poems, the sweet words…. Then the KISS….. expected, desired, needed for days… years? Life started… Life as we never knew it before… Love…can there be more love? And more love? And even more love? From one to two, to family… From loving my life with you… To cant even breath without you... Ten years… Feelings, emotions, thoughts, moments, memories…. All you…every day you…. My forever and my reason….

Hello hello, I have not stopped writing and definitely, I have not stopped having ideas and confusions in my mind... The two latest have been published at the blog of the South African Young Academy of Science (SAYAS). International Day of Women and Girls in Science: why not to like it! Click here . The journey of a paper. Click here . I will come back soon ;) Beware! :)

Today we celebrate “South African first day at school” day. You live in Mars (or in another country) if you have not posted or seen or received at least one photo or post with “My baby is going to school today” or “Grade 1 here we come” or “First day of Matric”. I was one of these proud ones that my bigboy started Grade R. One of those that did not stop taking photos. One of those that put on their sunglasses to hide their tears. One of those that did not know if they should be happy or sad when my bigboy left me to go play with the friends. One of those that panicked the day before thinking that “I don’t have everything for the first day – what a bad mummy I am”. One of those that realised that her baby is not a baby anymore – he wears a uniform!!! But it did not actually hit me today. It hit me a few days ago. My bigboy lost his two front teeth. They were loose for some time and we decided to visit the dentist to check if everything is fine, where he said we nee...

This specific race up the mountain at the borders of South Africa and Lesotho I have run twice in my life. Knowing the route one might say that fact is on its own special. Well, what is so unique about this race for me is that every single time, that run teaches me so many things about me, about my loved ones, about life itself. I had previously shared “running” lessons here but this time around, while running at the end of November under dismal conditions (I will tell you just now..), I had an internal review of the year that passed. Moreover, with this came the realisation, that many thoughts, lessons and success were taught to me by ….my running shoes. To put some perspective… I decided to run the Sani Stagger half – marathon for the first time in 2015. The excitement was at its peak, although I was relatively scared too. I had never run off-road before and the rumours were that this is not an easy downhill. On top of all of this, it was cold – very cold. To cut the long s...

I always loved birthdays, all birthdays... Just the excitement of waiting for the day to come…  Mine were my absolute favourite always (before my kids arrived)…As every little child I guess. It was not about the specific day but rather the whole week beforehand. The weekend before, my mum was taking me to choose the clothes I would wear at the party. Oh the excitement! I could pick anything. Well, almost everything. My mum always had her own stylistic preferences that at times were imposed to me and my sister making us look like unnatural twins with a five-year age difference. And then, the choice of a birthday cake. A couple of days before the party, my father would take me to a (the same every year) pastry shop. They had hundreds of photos of possible cakes to order – or it felt like it. I spent the whole afternoon discussing the options; whether another friend had it already, whether it was in fashion, the colours, and the flavours. Thinking about it now, it was not only ...

The last couple of months I decided not to write (well, ok, circumstances and busy life contributed to that decision too) but I was actively observing life around me. To be more precise, I was trying to identify demonstrations of love. Any kind of love, anywhere. I have consciously convinced myself I have a purpose to seek love in all its manifestations and in all possible places. Almost like a social experiment trying to disprove the hypothesis that we live in a cruel world without love. Or maybe a personal experiment to convince myself that love is here around me and I should worry about nothing. Or maybe call it an exorcism of the bad: the more I find love, the more love will find me. In order to do so, I had to first define love in my mind…and I looked at the dictionary…. Love (noun) 1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep...

What I learned from my nephew… Or my angel-nephew’s legacy through his tannie’s eyes… They say that there are people that are close to us for a lifetime and they make absolutely no impact in the way we see the world or the way we want to be as personalities. And at the same time there are others that pass close to us like a ray of sunshine through the curtains in a cold winter afternoon and bring us warmth and hope unimaginable. I had one of those in my life. Mistake….I HAVE one of those in my life. And most people would think that I would talk about a guru of self-fulfilment, or a teacher of spirituality, or a priest… No, he is a 3-year old, our ray of sunshine, that was borrowed to our lives for a little while but changed us forever not only with his quality while he was with us but also with his absence.. So what I(we) have learned and how I (we) have changed was his purpose on earth? I am not sure… people don’t come with a manual, ultimate purpose a...